"We can also practice in the Horizon. Make sure everything is perfect."
Not that Viktor would accept anything otherwise. This is his life they're talking about, and Jayce has made it clear that they're not going to take chances with it. He's not in the desperate position he was back home. They have time to get it right.
That does not, however, mean that it will be simple, or easy. Already Viktor is envisioning a complex procedure that he's not sure they really have the medical equipment or expertise to execute. Oh well. Viktor has made it clear that there's very little he won't do, in service of a cure. If that means outright cutting him open to get at his ailing lungs, well, now they have an actual surgeon on their team.
So he can begrudgingly admit that he's glad to have entertained the discussion, though of course he doesn't want Jayce to think that he's avoiding potentially lifesaving avenues as a matter of pride. He rubs his thumb across Jayce's cheek.
"You know it isn't that. I was...angry, that Tony sees this as a puzzle for him to solve."
"Exactly. And we will. We're taking as few risks as possible."
Jayce is sure that Viktor got into the position he was because he felt he had no time, and in their world, he didn't. Rushing was dangerous but it was in desperation. They don't have that here. They have found successful stop-gaps to keep him alive until then. It makes a difference, Jayce would be frantic if they had to push too far too fast. He became a healer for Viktor, to give him this time.
When they do pull it off, it will be extensive, yes. There is no getting around the fact this is still going to be the most dangerous thing Viktor will ever do to himself. But he has support now. Jayce is glad to have other members of the team. He and Viktor alone could probably handle it, but they don't have to.
He shakes his head a little, running his hand along Viktor's spine like he often does out of comfort or just to feel him. Jayce has a pretty good read on people. "I think he was out of line in his approach and attitude, you have strict boundaries and deserve people to respect them, but I do think he cares about you and you're not a puzzle. He has bad blood with Stephen, it couldn't have been easy to go to him for help, even for someone else." Jayce observed their tense behavior on the network and at the town hall.
"But if you want me to push him around a little, I can do that." It's completely a joke as they both know.
Even if the thought of it gets him to smile a little. He understands, fundamentally, that Tony does not actually want him to die--Viktor just rankles at the idea of being something to figure out, rather than a person who is just trying to find a way to live. And the thought that Tony knows better than either of them about what to do and how to do it, well. That's a matter of pride. He'll get over it, especially now that he's weathered the consult in question, but it's not going to stop him from voicing his displeasure with regards to how it came about.
But, there's no real reason to keep talking about Tony and his various fraught relationships with old teammates. What he discussed with Strange is imminently more important.
"I'm concerned that what we need to do may be more...invasive. Than what I originally planned."
Maybe this is his nice way of asking if Jayce would be ready to handle something like that, when the time comes.
It is a little lightness about something very serious. Viktor is the one who gets sick with anxiety, but Jayce does over something horrific. Whatever they need to do to him, it is going to be difficult for the person who loves him. He understands what Viktor is trying to tell him. If surgery is involved, it will already mean cutting him open, and he has gotten used to that in his medical training. But not when the subject is alive or the love of his life.
"I'll be healing the whole time, I can keep feeding you lifeforce at least, as we go."
It will boost VIktor's body being able to sustain no matter what they're doing. Not to fix him, but make him stronger. Jayce can give him that. He knows it isn't perfect, but it will help. He stands up from his place on the bed and pulls Viktor into a full embrace. Jayce rests his head against his, just holding him for a moment.
Viktor pulls both of his hands through Jayce's pristine hair, somehow un-mussed even as he fretted in the room for the last hour. He can't decide if it's to reassure Jayce or to comfort himself. Maybe a little of both. He knows that relying on Jayce for healing magic--the fact that he's entirely reliant on Jayce to keep himself alive--is not an ideal situation, and is probably coloring their relationship much more than he'd like, but he's more-or-less resigned himself to this. It's what it is, for now. All they can do is hope that their plan works, and move forward from there.
"More afraid of what will happen if we don't try."
That's sincere. Viktor has made it clear he doesn't want to give up, not yet, but if they don't do anything , he's resigning himself to wasting away. Slowly becoming unable to work, body no longer able to keep up with his mind. Jayce's healing magic has made it possible for him to continue their projects, to have enough stamina to get through the day, to mitigate his chronic pain. It's more than just time. It means more to him than he can ever express.
"It will be no different than my other surgeries." The one thing he couldn't exactly hide, in all the years of his declining health. Recovery periods are often immutable. "You'll need to bring me all my notebooks. I might even make you read to me."
Jayce's hair is difficult to mess up but he likes when Viktor tries. He also just likes every comforting gesture between them. He too knows that Viktor having to rely on him to survive is a double-edged sword. He will never be sorry about it, it's given them precious time to finish the cure and also time for them to be together, but he knows his prideful lover doesn't like relying on anyone. It's temporary.
Jayce is not so insecure as to want to keep being a crutch for Viktor though. He doesn't want to be needed this way forever, for both of their sakes. But it is worth it. Every moment of this is worth it. He is reminded of that all over again when Viktor is in his arms, telling him the truth and expressing himself rather than hiding it away. That means just as much.
The only reason Jayce fears it is because they can stopgap this longer, making their time together longer. Once they do the surgery, once the Hexcore is finished, that can be it. It's do or die, literally. Viktor's life will be in their hands for real. That's what he is afraid of, but he won't let that hold them back either.
"I will be happy to. You'll have to live with all your new friends wanting to visit too." Jayce smiles and cups Viktor's face, kissing him sweetly. "I'll read you a non-academic book for once. Maybe something fiction." This means that Viktor still wants him around after being cured. Jayce already knew that, as his partner at least, but sometimes he has insecurities. He holds them within himself for now.
"You're starting to think a little bit about after." Jayce points out, softly. Yes, it's just the notebooks, and the reading to him, but it's something.
It's tempting, to see how long Jayce's healing magic will work. Perhaps it's the safer option, rather than taking a chance on a permanent cure, especially when they aren't sure if the effort will kill him. He's already had much longer than he should have, thanks to Jayce's efforts--maybe if he keeps getting stronger, Viktor can hold out. He knows, however, that they need to take the risk on a permanent solution. If they fail, he would rather they fail in the attempt. Viktor would rather it be abrupt than a slow wasting away, and he's sure Jayce would prefer that too, even if neither of them are going to say as much.
Viktor leans into the kiss and lingers in the embrace for a moment before ducking out of Jayce's arms and easing himself down on the bed.
For all he found it difficult to envision a future after his illness, Viktor finds that Jayce is right. These thoughts are creeping in more frequently, now that their plans are starting to come to fruition and they are slowly making their way towards the most vital experiment either of them will ever perform. Do or die, literally.
"I don't know," he admits, shrugging. He's still not sure if he believes in what he's saying. "It seems better to talk about than the alternative."
In truth, Jayce is afraid of taking the risk, it is the better thing to do, but it speeds up the possibility of losing him. He is pretty positive when they do get to that point, he will secretly have his doubts and terror over it, but he won't give up either. This is Viktor's life and Viktor's choice and he is in 100%. Viktor deserves to live free of his own fear. Jayce's fears can't be stopped, but they can be overcome.
He sits on the bed with Viktor, he never likes to be that far from him if he can help it. Nocwich turned out to be a brilliant idea. For all the obvious reasons, and who knows, maybe this meeting could be a key to what they do eventually. He's optimistic!
"I didn't mean to bring too much attention to it."
He doesn't want Viktor to get in his head about it, since it is the bare basic of thinking post-success. Jayce sees it more as perhaps a glimmer of hope. The smallest 'maybe after' thought from Viktor is hopeful. Jayce has purposely not mentioned any of his future thoughts out of respect for what Viktor told him, but it hasn't stopped him from thinking about it.
"It's great to see so many people here for the first time. I couldn't believe it when I finally got to hug Wanda or pat Kell on the back." They both know that the Horizon feels real, but they prefer to do certain things in real life. It is different. "Sometimes I wish we all could be in one place."
"You don't have to avoid talking about things with me."
Viktor did enough of that, mostly to both of their detriments. Jayce is going to be taking care of him, one way or another, so he deserves to talk about it if he wants. This is the reality of their situation, and he's resolved not to bottle things up. He thinks he's getting better at it, but it's hard not to want to bottle things up. Old habits die hard.
Jayce seems to sense that, if the change in subject is any indication. Since they're sitting next to each other on the bed, Viktor takes the opportunity to move, first against Jayce's side and then behind him to better snake arms around his broad chest. He rests his chin on Jayce's shoulder and tilts his head slightly, pressing his mouth to the side of his neck. Too often he feels like he isn't good with words, in matters like this. He'd much rather reassure with actions, instead.
"I was lucky enough to meet Wanda in person at the Summit." What he doesn't say is how accustomed they'd become to meeting in the Horizon since, and how alarmed she seemed, to see him as he really is. "But with all of us here, together--we're certainly being surveilled."
"I'm not avoiding, love. I'm living in the present with you."
That was what Jayce took out of Viktor's confession that him talking about the future all the time was uncomfortable. He couldn't see the future whereas Jayce can only look toward it with bright eyes and big hopes. It was a perfectly reasonable thing from Viktor's point of view, and Jayce has intentionally not mentioned it since. And he words it in a positive way like that. Living with Viktor now, not living in a fantasy Jayce made up.
Jayce adjusts so Viktor can move comfortably around him and he just sinks into his affection. He drowns in Viktor's affection sometimes, lets it wrap around him so nothing else exists but them. Physical reassurance is always the way to Jayce's heart and to calm his mind. He places his hand on one of Viktor's arms around him, tilting his head to the side when Viktor kisses his neck. He sighs happily, closing his eyes briefly to simply enjoy; nothing is better than this.
"Oh definitely, by the Nocwich people, by our own people, and I have no doubt our factions are intending to spy on Nocwich while they have the chance too. It's been separated a long time. I wonder what they'd do if one of us tried to move factions, all the portals are open. It seems like it would be the only chance."
Jayce is not saying that because he wants to, he has built a reputation in Cadens now, but he is thinking of other people who may be separated. If Viktor was somewhere else, he would have done anything to get to him.
Jayce settles into him and Viktor squeezes him in response, hands somewhat unashamedly spreading across his chest. Given their size difference, it takes a bit for Viktor to feel like he's enveloping Jayce entirely, but to his own credit, he thinks he does his best. He offers an affirmative noise while the conversation proceeds, but while Jayce talks he noses against him, planting another kiss at the nape of his neck.
"They let people go during the summit, though it was under the close eye of the various officials. I'm not sure who actually went through with it."
A testament, perhaps, to some kind of loyalty--or at least a desire to stay with what's familiar. Viktor, for his part, is too established in Cadens to even think about going elsewhere. Besides, they need the technology.
"I highly doubt they'll entertain it here."
Not when everyone is trying to avoid a diplomatic incident.
Jayce smiles as Viktor's hands move over him; he's not always the most overtly complimentary, unlike Jayce, but Viktor's very good at speaking through actions. And the way he appreciatively runs his fingers over Jayce sometimes says plenty. He doesn't need to follow cover him for it to feel like he's surrounding Jayce. He is really connected to Viktor's physicality so it works well. The kiss at his nape is sweet and he soaks it in.
"Maybe the portals are keyed into where people are from, and you wouldn't be able to jump to another."
Not that Jayce would test it out. Well. He might test it out, if it was just him, because he is a scientist and he's curious. But he really does not want to cause an incident or be separated from Viktor. It's just a thought.
"If they're surveilling us there's not much we can do about it. I keep waiting for the vampires to ask us for blood again." Jayce is not looking to be someone's lunch, unless it's Alucard and he needs it, in which case of course he would help his friend. But otherwise, no thanks. "Also pretty sure there's blood in their wine." There's a distinct smell.
He runs a hand up and down Viktor's arm lovingly. "I love when you do this." The hugging him in this particular way, wrapped around him, how can he not?
Would any of the factions go so far as to sabotage portals? Do the Summoned have certain markers--magical or biological otherwise--that tie them to a place and make them unable to leave without permission, covert or otherwise. Viktor thinks he might like to puzzle it out, given the chance. A shame they have too much else to worry about.
For now, he intends to learn as much about Nocwich as he can, and enjoy Jayce's company in the process (though that's a given). Viktor is less squeamish about the blood than other people might be, both because of his friendship with Alucard and his own magical dabbling, though he certainly didn't offer it to the vampires when asked.
"You don't have to drink it." But since they're talking about vampires anyway, and Jayce is also expressing how nice this is, Viktor's next kiss is less of a kiss and more of a bite. To his neck. "But it might be polite."
"Maybe all the factions had an agreement that if people tried to swap they would make them go back, as part of this whole temporary peace. But I'm probably overthinking it."
Jayce thinks of maybe too many options! Some of them more nefarious than their captors actually considered. The two of them have no intention of moving so it doesn't really matter to them, but he imagines some people might be unhappy where they are. He does always find it interesting to speculate on what is possible with magic here, and Nocwich has been silent for so long. Who knows what they're capable of?
Jayce is definitely squeamish. Alucard he'd be willing to do a lot for, but he doesn't know these vampires. "I'm not going to dr---oh." Listen, he doesn't care if it's polite. He's not doing it. That however goes right out of his mind when Viktor bites him and he shivers. "What, are you mimicking the natives?" He chuckles and hooks his hand back to run fingers through Viktor's hair. He in no way tries to remove his head from what it's doing though.
Jayce has a tendency to bite and mark Viktor's pale skin, it's becoming a little ridiculous and it's lucky most people can't see underneath his shirt. "I'd give you my blood," he flirts, which is a weird thing to flirt about, but here they are.
In fact, he doubts that their captors have given it this much thought. Once again, he finds himself thinking that he'd like to get a look at the portal mechanism (or the magic that lets it happen), but writes it off as a waste of time. Something to add to the list of things he tries not to think about--the list of things he wants to do if and when they manage to cure him.
He pushes that out of his mind. Viktor bites down just enough for it to hurt, then kisses him in the same spot, to soothe away the sting.
"We don't know if they do that." Bite necks, he means. "This could be very culturally insensitive. I might create a diplomatic incident, and unfortunately for you, Doctor Strange said nothing about the necessity of a transfusion."
Yes he'll talk about himself in the third person because in this case, it's so typical of him. Jayce can spend hours just overthinking any given situation. Most of the time he likes doing it because it's just how his mind works and he's fascinated by a lot of subjects. He has probably given things a lot more thought than the actual factions.
"I really want to learn more about portals and teleporting."
It doesn't seem like an easy thing to learn the way most things are, probably because they don't want people to be able to get around in ways they can't track or control. But Jayce's entire focus was on the Hexgates, of course he wants to do what that mage who saved him was capable of.
Jayce doesn't mind a little sting to the bite and the kiss after soothes it over anyway. He laughs about it being culturally insensitive. "Doctor Strange, now that's quite a name." Obviously, he knows he is Dr. Stephen Strange, but said like that, it's amusing. "I can't believe I'm flirting about drinking blood, we've gone down a weird path." He loves it though.
"You know if you're going to keep groping me, you could take my shirt off." That is less weird flirting, Viktor is putting his hands all over his chest.
Viktor is a little less enthused by teleportation--that had been a stepping stone for him, but he certainly understands why Jayce in particular is interested in unraveling those secrets. If they're going to bring Strange to them, however, then maybe the need to figure it out sooner rather than later.
"Well, maybe you can work on that, if we're going to bring our new friend to Cadens for surgery."
It is quite a name, to the point where he wonders if it's a pseudonym, but he supposes in the end it doesn't matter. Every day they're charting a clearer path forward, and it won't be long before all of the pieces are in place.
So he's resolved to enjoy these moments while he can, hands sliding under the hem of Jayce's shirt at his request. Since he insists. Viktor moves his hands up inside Jayce's clothes--if he wants the shirt off, he can certainly take care of it--now that he's achieved skin to skin contact, he squeezes again, more shamelessly this time.
"He's an actual mage, I doubt I can do better than him in just a few months." Jayce smiles. "But I do like a challenge."
Jayce still doesn't see himself as a mage which is ridiculous as he's a very good one already. With the enchantment book from Kell, he's going to be able to step up that skill, since healing is going so well. Who knows what else he'll be able to do. Still, he thinks it's unlikely he can outmatch someone who is apparently a powerful magic user from Tony's world. Viktor knows he'll do whatever he can to make their situation work though. There is no limit to what Jayce is willing to do.
He is the one who playfully mentioned it, but still the press of Viktor's hands against his bare skin never gets old. Jayce runs hot and it's even more true when Viktor's touching him. He laughs at the squeeze and takes the shirt off himself since apparently he's going to have to. Jayce knows how people look at him, his body is impressive, it wasn't intentional but created through a lot of hard work. It matters more if Viktor likes looking, if he enjoys it. Jayce wants to be desirable. So sue him.
"You know, I haven't forgotten that your first response to seeing me naked was to roll your eyes. Very rude."
"You're a mage too, Jayce." Viktor will insist, even if Jayce continues to undersell himself. It's not as though he can gloss over the fact that he's still alive because of Jayce's healing magic, and though ordinarily he might not want to bring it up, this moment feels intimate and it seems appropriate. "You've given me so much more time. You have a gift."
That's a significant amount of ego stroking, he knows. Combined with the fact that Viktor is currently running his hands over the expanse of Jayce's bare skin, he imagines that an implosion is imminent. The good news is that he always makes it incredibly easy for Viktor take him down a peg.
It's all betrayed, of course, by the way Viktor keeps touching him, pulling him close and kissing him between words.
"And you know exactly why I was rolling my eyes. You're not fooling anyone, acting as though you don't know how handsome you are."
Jayce blushes more from the compliment than he does about the groping because they both know the importance of his healing but he doesn't often bring attention to it. Their healing sessions are very intimate even having done it many times now. "Well when you put it like that, I can't argue with you."
Jayce loves magic. It is exactly what he always dreamed about. The only thing that turned out to be better than magic is this thing between them, and that he also dreamed about. He will have to talk to Stephen another time and learn how he feels about magic, although he'll be careful considering Wanda's situation.
He is far more focused on the fact that Viktor's long beautiful fingers are caressing over him hungrily, like they can't get enough of him. And there's another compliment to add to the pile, as much of a turn-on as literally stroking him can be. "Handsome how?" Jayce grins and catches Viktor by the back of his neck, leaning to steal a deep kiss from him. "Give me specifics." Hey, he gives Viktor specifics about his looks all the time.
Jayce is mostly joking although considering how hot he's getting, only slightly joking. "So what if I want to impress you, V? I'm your boyfriend, I'm allowed."
"What do you mean, handsome how?" Viktor is prevented from further outrage by Jayce capturing his mouth, and he indulges in spite of himself, even if he certainly has more to say on the matter. "You're a mathematician, aren't you? Surely you understand that certain ratios are naturally pleasing, in an aesthetic sense."
It's all in the proportions, Jayce.
"Sometimes I think about how unfair it is, that you have the mind you do, and also look like this."
Viktor knows he gives off the impression that he cares only for his work and little else--doesn't really think about his own personal needs, to say nothing of sparing any thought for the aesthetics of other people, but he's got his own wants and preferences regardless. He is, in fact, capable of finding someone attractive, though in Jayce's case, it's not without taking his ego down a peg. He scoffs.
"So you're saying that logically and mathematically I am aesthetically attractive." Jayce is really amused now and absolutely delighted. Bordering on gleeful. Yes, fine, it may feed his ego, but it's okay, eventually he'll be dropped back down to earth. He is going to take this and be smug about it for a few days. All of this just makes him shine even brighter so sorry, he is only getting more handsome with his warm eyes and happy smile. Deal with it Viktor.
Then he's complimenting his mind and his body so Jayce is done. He turns his body quickly and presses Viktor into the bed, leaning down to kiss him passionately, not at all embarrassed that Viktor's open desire turns him on. It's not easy to get praise out of Viktor so he eats it all up. Jayce knows if he wants to drag Viktor's clothes off him it will require more space but at the moment he is just enjoying feeling his body against him.
He stops the kiss but can't help going back for more a second later, although eventually he manages to stop, panting. Jayce moves off Viktor and further onto the bed, turning onto his back, his skin flushed from Viktor's bites and words. "Come up here, keep touching me. Please, V." Viktor knows that Jayce never hesitates from begging or has any shame about it.
"I'm open to a less teenage title, but partner can be too formal. Lover?"
Viktor sounds increasingly exasperated, then offers a shout of indignation when Jayce turns around and presses them both into the mattress. He's still fully clothed, and his leg brace makes maneuvering difficult, not to mention uncomfortable. Jayce is eager, as always, and Viktor wants to reciprocate, but sometimes they both need to be reminded not to be so hasty. Despite the abrupt positioning, Viktor does his best to return the first kiss and then the second, then thankfully Jayce rolls over next to him, making it clear where this is going to go.
(Which he should have expected, really, given the fact that he was the one who worked Jayce up in the first place.)
"I need a minute," he says, scooting back towards the edge of the bed, hand automatically going to the buckles on his leg. "And, I like partner. It feels more--" Committal, is what he doesn't say. "--mature."
Sometimes Jayce gets ahead of himself when he gets riled up. This time it's Jayce who moves down the bed behind Viktor, fluid and graceful, running his fingers through his hair. He kisses his neck and doesn't help him with his leg, he doesn't need that, but he does copy Viktor by moving his hands under Viktor's shirt. Jayce waits until he is finished with his leg though so he can have Viktor's hands free to slide his shirt off him.
He gets to work on the back brace since he is in the easiest position to, kissing all along Viktor's exposed soft neck. Where Viktor was slow and tempting when he did this, Jayce is heated and hungry, but he is worked up. The idea that Viktor thinks he's that attractive is settling on him. That Viktor might desire him in a way he can't resist.
"I think you're beautiful." Viktor is well aware of that, he tells him regularly. "So I like that you're saying I'm handsome as proven by science." Viktor's lust for him is undeniable, he shows him regularly, but as they both know, Jayce likes verbal reminders. He doesn't need more than this though. It'll feed him for a long time.
"But we've always used partner. Am I supposed to say romantic partner every time?"
Jayce unable to keep his hands off him proves distracting, and Viktor fumbles with the buckles more than he ordinarily would. He doesn't even care about getting fully undressed, but Jayce seems to be making that decision for him. The one advantage to having one leg strapped up in metal and leather is that it usually affords them a few moments to slow down and breathe while Viktor works it off. The back brace is similar in that it anchors to metal implants, forcing some degree of meticulousness, when it comes to taking it off and putting it back on again.
He finishes the buckles around his thigh and then lifts his arms so that Jayce can pull his shirt off, before he hunches back over to work on the rest of it. This, of course, has the added advantage, of providing a large swath of pale skin for Jayce to put his hands all over. Viktor shudders a little at the mouth on the back of his neck,
"I know you do." He says it all the time, and though Viktor knows that Jayce doesn't care how sick he is, he still finds himself wishing he could be less ragged. Be more like he knows he's supposed to be, were he left un-ravaged by the Undercity. He straightens, letting the metal clatter to the floor, using his good leg to nudge his boot off, then his shoes.
"If people can't figure out whether you mean romantic partners, I consider it their problem." But, he gets it. Jayce wants no ambiguity, when it comes to letting others know whether or not they're together. "Shall I call you my significant other, instead?"
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zvi
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Date: 2022-09-25 02:27 pm (UTC)Not that Viktor would accept anything otherwise. This is his life they're talking about, and Jayce has made it clear that they're not going to take chances with it. He's not in the desperate position he was back home. They have time to get it right.
That does not, however, mean that it will be simple, or easy. Already Viktor is envisioning a complex procedure that he's not sure they really have the medical equipment or expertise to execute. Oh well. Viktor has made it clear that there's very little he won't do, in service of a cure. If that means outright cutting him open to get at his ailing lungs, well, now they have an actual surgeon on their team.
So he can begrudgingly admit that he's glad to have entertained the discussion, though of course he doesn't want Jayce to think that he's avoiding potentially lifesaving avenues as a matter of pride. He rubs his thumb across Jayce's cheek.
"You know it isn't that. I was...angry, that Tony sees this as a puzzle for him to solve."
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Date: 2022-09-25 04:11 pm (UTC)Jayce is sure that Viktor got into the position he was because he felt he had no time, and in their world, he didn't. Rushing was dangerous but it was in desperation. They don't have that here. They have found successful stop-gaps to keep him alive until then. It makes a difference, Jayce would be frantic if they had to push too far too fast. He became a healer for Viktor, to give him this time.
When they do pull it off, it will be extensive, yes. There is no getting around the fact this is still going to be the most dangerous thing Viktor will ever do to himself. But he has support now. Jayce is glad to have other members of the team. He and Viktor alone could probably handle it, but they don't have to.
He shakes his head a little, running his hand along Viktor's spine like he often does out of comfort or just to feel him. Jayce has a pretty good read on people. "I think he was out of line in his approach and attitude, you have strict boundaries and deserve people to respect them, but I do think he cares about you and you're not a puzzle. He has bad blood with Stephen, it couldn't have been easy to go to him for help, even for someone else." Jayce observed their tense behavior on the network and at the town hall.
"But if you want me to push him around a little, I can do that." It's completely a joke as they both know.
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Date: 2022-09-25 05:20 pm (UTC)Even if the thought of it gets him to smile a little. He understands, fundamentally, that Tony does not actually want him to die--Viktor just rankles at the idea of being something to figure out, rather than a person who is just trying to find a way to live. And the thought that Tony knows better than either of them about what to do and how to do it, well. That's a matter of pride. He'll get over it, especially now that he's weathered the consult in question, but it's not going to stop him from voicing his displeasure with regards to how it came about.
But, there's no real reason to keep talking about Tony and his various fraught relationships with old teammates. What he discussed with Strange is imminently more important.
"I'm concerned that what we need to do may be more...invasive. Than what I originally planned."
Maybe this is his nice way of asking if Jayce would be ready to handle something like that, when the time comes.
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Date: 2022-09-25 05:32 pm (UTC)It is a little lightness about something very serious. Viktor is the one who gets sick with anxiety, but Jayce does over something horrific. Whatever they need to do to him, it is going to be difficult for the person who loves him. He understands what Viktor is trying to tell him. If surgery is involved, it will already mean cutting him open, and he has gotten used to that in his medical training. But not when the subject is alive or the love of his life.
"I'll be healing the whole time, I can keep feeding you lifeforce at least, as we go."
It will boost VIktor's body being able to sustain no matter what they're doing. Not to fix him, but make him stronger. Jayce can give him that. He knows it isn't perfect, but it will help. He stands up from his place on the bed and pulls Viktor into a full embrace. Jayce rests his head against his, just holding him for a moment.
"Are you afraid?"
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Date: 2022-09-26 01:44 am (UTC)Viktor pulls both of his hands through Jayce's pristine hair, somehow un-mussed even as he fretted in the room for the last hour. He can't decide if it's to reassure Jayce or to comfort himself. Maybe a little of both. He knows that relying on Jayce for healing magic--the fact that he's entirely reliant on Jayce to keep himself alive--is not an ideal situation, and is probably coloring their relationship much more than he'd like, but he's more-or-less resigned himself to this. It's what it is, for now. All they can do is hope that their plan works, and move forward from there.
"More afraid of what will happen if we don't try."
That's sincere. Viktor has made it clear he doesn't want to give up, not yet, but if they don't do anything , he's resigning himself to wasting away. Slowly becoming unable to work, body no longer able to keep up with his mind. Jayce's healing magic has made it possible for him to continue their projects, to have enough stamina to get through the day, to mitigate his chronic pain. It's more than just time. It means more to him than he can ever express.
"It will be no different than my other surgeries." The one thing he couldn't exactly hide, in all the years of his declining health. Recovery periods are often immutable. "You'll need to bring me all my notebooks. I might even make you read to me."
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Date: 2022-09-26 02:13 am (UTC)Jayce is not so insecure as to want to keep being a crutch for Viktor though. He doesn't want to be needed this way forever, for both of their sakes. But it is worth it. Every moment of this is worth it. He is reminded of that all over again when Viktor is in his arms, telling him the truth and expressing himself rather than hiding it away. That means just as much.
The only reason Jayce fears it is because they can stopgap this longer, making their time together longer. Once they do the surgery, once the Hexcore is finished, that can be it. It's do or die, literally. Viktor's life will be in their hands for real. That's what he is afraid of, but he won't let that hold them back either.
"I will be happy to. You'll have to live with all your new friends wanting to visit too." Jayce smiles and cups Viktor's face, kissing him sweetly. "I'll read you a non-academic book for once. Maybe something fiction." This means that Viktor still wants him around after being cured. Jayce already knew that, as his partner at least, but sometimes he has insecurities. He holds them within himself for now.
"You're starting to think a little bit about after." Jayce points out, softly. Yes, it's just the notebooks, and the reading to him, but it's something.
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Date: 2022-09-26 03:54 pm (UTC)Viktor leans into the kiss and lingers in the embrace for a moment before ducking out of Jayce's arms and easing himself down on the bed.
For all he found it difficult to envision a future after his illness, Viktor finds that Jayce is right. These thoughts are creeping in more frequently, now that their plans are starting to come to fruition and they are slowly making their way towards the most vital experiment either of them will ever perform. Do or die, literally.
"I don't know," he admits, shrugging. He's still not sure if he believes in what he's saying. "It seems better to talk about than the alternative."
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Date: 2022-09-26 04:34 pm (UTC)He sits on the bed with Viktor, he never likes to be that far from him if he can help it. Nocwich turned out to be a brilliant idea. For all the obvious reasons, and who knows, maybe this meeting could be a key to what they do eventually. He's optimistic!
"I didn't mean to bring too much attention to it."
He doesn't want Viktor to get in his head about it, since it is the bare basic of thinking post-success. Jayce sees it more as perhaps a glimmer of hope. The smallest 'maybe after' thought from Viktor is hopeful. Jayce has purposely not mentioned any of his future thoughts out of respect for what Viktor told him, but it hasn't stopped him from thinking about it.
"It's great to see so many people here for the first time. I couldn't believe it when I finally got to hug Wanda or pat Kell on the back." They both know that the Horizon feels real, but they prefer to do certain things in real life. It is different. "Sometimes I wish we all could be in one place."
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Date: 2022-09-28 01:55 am (UTC)Viktor did enough of that, mostly to both of their detriments. Jayce is going to be taking care of him, one way or another, so he deserves to talk about it if he wants. This is the reality of their situation, and he's resolved not to bottle things up. He thinks he's getting better at it, but it's hard not to want to bottle things up. Old habits die hard.
Jayce seems to sense that, if the change in subject is any indication. Since they're sitting next to each other on the bed, Viktor takes the opportunity to move, first against Jayce's side and then behind him to better snake arms around his broad chest. He rests his chin on Jayce's shoulder and tilts his head slightly, pressing his mouth to the side of his neck. Too often he feels like he isn't good with words, in matters like this. He'd much rather reassure with actions, instead.
"I was lucky enough to meet Wanda in person at the Summit." What he doesn't say is how accustomed they'd become to meeting in the Horizon since, and how alarmed she seemed, to see him as he really is. "But with all of us here, together--we're certainly being surveilled."
The trade-off, he supposes.
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Date: 2022-09-28 02:25 am (UTC)That was what Jayce took out of Viktor's confession that him talking about the future all the time was uncomfortable. He couldn't see the future whereas Jayce can only look toward it with bright eyes and big hopes. It was a perfectly reasonable thing from Viktor's point of view, and Jayce has intentionally not mentioned it since. And he words it in a positive way like that. Living with Viktor now, not living in a fantasy Jayce made up.
Jayce adjusts so Viktor can move comfortably around him and he just sinks into his affection. He drowns in Viktor's affection sometimes, lets it wrap around him so nothing else exists but them. Physical reassurance is always the way to Jayce's heart and to calm his mind. He places his hand on one of Viktor's arms around him, tilting his head to the side when Viktor kisses his neck. He sighs happily, closing his eyes briefly to simply enjoy; nothing is better than this.
"Oh definitely, by the Nocwich people, by our own people, and I have no doubt our factions are intending to spy on Nocwich while they have the chance too. It's been separated a long time. I wonder what they'd do if one of us tried to move factions, all the portals are open. It seems like it would be the only chance."
Jayce is not saying that because he wants to, he has built a reputation in Cadens now, but he is thinking of other people who may be separated. If Viktor was somewhere else, he would have done anything to get to him.
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Date: 2022-09-28 11:55 pm (UTC)"They let people go during the summit, though it was under the close eye of the various officials. I'm not sure who actually went through with it."
A testament, perhaps, to some kind of loyalty--or at least a desire to stay with what's familiar. Viktor, for his part, is too established in Cadens to even think about going elsewhere. Besides, they need the technology.
"I highly doubt they'll entertain it here."
Not when everyone is trying to avoid a diplomatic incident.
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Date: 2022-09-29 12:31 am (UTC)"Maybe the portals are keyed into where people are from, and you wouldn't be able to jump to another."
Not that Jayce would test it out. Well. He might test it out, if it was just him, because he is a scientist and he's curious. But he really does not want to cause an incident or be separated from Viktor. It's just a thought.
"If they're surveilling us there's not much we can do about it. I keep waiting for the vampires to ask us for blood again." Jayce is not looking to be someone's lunch, unless it's Alucard and he needs it, in which case of course he would help his friend. But otherwise, no thanks. "Also pretty sure there's blood in their wine." There's a distinct smell.
He runs a hand up and down Viktor's arm lovingly. "I love when you do this." The hugging him in this particular way, wrapped around him, how can he not?
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Date: 2022-09-29 03:55 am (UTC)Would any of the factions go so far as to sabotage portals? Do the Summoned have certain markers--magical or biological otherwise--that tie them to a place and make them unable to leave without permission, covert or otherwise. Viktor thinks he might like to puzzle it out, given the chance. A shame they have too much else to worry about.
For now, he intends to learn as much about Nocwich as he can, and enjoy Jayce's company in the process (though that's a given). Viktor is less squeamish about the blood than other people might be, both because of his friendship with Alucard and his own magical dabbling, though he certainly didn't offer it to the vampires when asked.
"You don't have to drink it." But since they're talking about vampires anyway, and Jayce is also expressing how nice this is, Viktor's next kiss is less of a kiss and more of a bite. To his neck. "But it might be polite."
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Date: 2022-09-29 01:07 pm (UTC)Jayce thinks of maybe too many options! Some of them more nefarious than their captors actually considered. The two of them have no intention of moving so it doesn't really matter to them, but he imagines some people might be unhappy where they are. He does always find it interesting to speculate on what is possible with magic here, and Nocwich has been silent for so long. Who knows what they're capable of?
Jayce is definitely squeamish. Alucard he'd be willing to do a lot for, but he doesn't know these vampires. "I'm not going to dr---oh." Listen, he doesn't care if it's polite. He's not doing it. That however goes right out of his mind when Viktor bites him and he shivers. "What, are you mimicking the natives?" He chuckles and hooks his hand back to run fingers through Viktor's hair. He in no way tries to remove his head from what it's doing though.
Jayce has a tendency to bite and mark Viktor's pale skin, it's becoming a little ridiculous and it's lucky most people can't see underneath his shirt. "I'd give you my blood," he flirts, which is a weird thing to flirt about, but here they are.
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Date: 2022-09-29 03:17 pm (UTC)In fact, he doubts that their captors have given it this much thought. Once again, he finds himself thinking that he'd like to get a look at the portal mechanism (or the magic that lets it happen), but writes it off as a waste of time. Something to add to the list of things he tries not to think about--the list of things he wants to do if and when they manage to cure him.
He pushes that out of his mind. Viktor bites down just enough for it to hurt, then kisses him in the same spot, to soothe away the sting.
"We don't know if they do that." Bite necks, he means. "This could be very culturally insensitive. I might create a diplomatic incident, and unfortunately for you, Doctor Strange said nothing about the necessity of a transfusion."
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Date: 2022-09-29 03:40 pm (UTC)Yes he'll talk about himself in the third person because in this case, it's so typical of him. Jayce can spend hours just overthinking any given situation. Most of the time he likes doing it because it's just how his mind works and he's fascinated by a lot of subjects. He has probably given things a lot more thought than the actual factions.
"I really want to learn more about portals and teleporting."
It doesn't seem like an easy thing to learn the way most things are, probably because they don't want people to be able to get around in ways they can't track or control. But Jayce's entire focus was on the Hexgates, of course he wants to do what that mage who saved him was capable of.
Jayce doesn't mind a little sting to the bite and the kiss after soothes it over anyway. He laughs about it being culturally insensitive. "Doctor Strange, now that's quite a name." Obviously, he knows he is Dr. Stephen Strange, but said like that, it's amusing. "I can't believe I'm flirting about drinking blood, we've gone down a weird path." He loves it though.
"You know if you're going to keep groping me, you could take my shirt off." That is less weird flirting, Viktor is putting his hands all over his chest.
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Date: 2022-09-30 12:54 am (UTC)Viktor is a little less enthused by teleportation--that had been a stepping stone for him, but he certainly understands why Jayce in particular is interested in unraveling those secrets. If they're going to bring Strange to them, however, then maybe the need to figure it out sooner rather than later.
"Well, maybe you can work on that, if we're going to bring our new friend to Cadens for surgery."
It is quite a name, to the point where he wonders if it's a pseudonym, but he supposes in the end it doesn't matter. Every day they're charting a clearer path forward, and it won't be long before all of the pieces are in place.
So he's resolved to enjoy these moments while he can, hands sliding under the hem of Jayce's shirt at his request. Since he insists. Viktor moves his hands up inside Jayce's clothes--if he wants the shirt off, he can certainly take care of it--now that he's achieved skin to skin contact, he squeezes again, more shamelessly this time.
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Date: 2022-09-30 01:09 am (UTC)Jayce still doesn't see himself as a mage which is ridiculous as he's a very good one already. With the enchantment book from Kell, he's going to be able to step up that skill, since healing is going so well. Who knows what else he'll be able to do. Still, he thinks it's unlikely he can outmatch someone who is apparently a powerful magic user from Tony's world. Viktor knows he'll do whatever he can to make their situation work though. There is no limit to what Jayce is willing to do.
He is the one who playfully mentioned it, but still the press of Viktor's hands against his bare skin never gets old. Jayce runs hot and it's even more true when Viktor's touching him. He laughs at the squeeze and takes the shirt off himself since apparently he's going to have to. Jayce knows how people look at him, his body is impressive, it wasn't intentional but created through a lot of hard work. It matters more if Viktor likes looking, if he enjoys it. Jayce wants to be desirable. So sue him.
"You know, I haven't forgotten that your first response to seeing me naked was to roll your eyes. Very rude."
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Date: 2022-09-30 01:59 am (UTC)That's a significant amount of ego stroking, he knows. Combined with the fact that Viktor is currently running his hands over the expanse of Jayce's bare skin, he imagines that an implosion is imminent. The good news is that he always makes it incredibly easy for Viktor take him down a peg.
It's all betrayed, of course, by the way Viktor keeps touching him, pulling him close and kissing him between words.
"And you know exactly why I was rolling my eyes. You're not fooling anyone, acting as though you don't know how handsome you are."
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Date: 2022-09-30 02:23 am (UTC)Jayce loves magic. It is exactly what he always dreamed about. The only thing that turned out to be better than magic is this thing between them, and that he also dreamed about. He will have to talk to Stephen another time and learn how he feels about magic, although he'll be careful considering Wanda's situation.
He is far more focused on the fact that Viktor's long beautiful fingers are caressing over him hungrily, like they can't get enough of him. And there's another compliment to add to the pile, as much of a turn-on as literally stroking him can be. "Handsome how?" Jayce grins and catches Viktor by the back of his neck, leaning to steal a deep kiss from him. "Give me specifics." Hey, he gives Viktor specifics about his looks all the time.
Jayce is mostly joking although considering how hot he's getting, only slightly joking. "So what if I want to impress you, V? I'm your boyfriend, I'm allowed."
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Date: 2022-09-30 04:23 pm (UTC)It's all in the proportions, Jayce.
"Sometimes I think about how unfair it is, that you have the mind you do, and also look like this."
Viktor knows he gives off the impression that he cares only for his work and little else--doesn't really think about his own personal needs, to say nothing of sparing any thought for the aesthetics of other people, but he's got his own wants and preferences regardless. He is, in fact, capable of finding someone attractive, though in Jayce's case, it's not without taking his ego down a peg. He scoffs.
"Boyfriend, Jayce? We're not teenagers."
annnd NSFW
Date: 2022-09-30 05:25 pm (UTC)Then he's complimenting his mind and his body so Jayce is done. He turns his body quickly and presses Viktor into the bed, leaning down to kiss him passionately, not at all embarrassed that Viktor's open desire turns him on. It's not easy to get praise out of Viktor so he eats it all up. Jayce knows if he wants to drag Viktor's clothes off him it will require more space but at the moment he is just enjoying feeling his body against him.
He stops the kiss but can't help going back for more a second later, although eventually he manages to stop, panting. Jayce moves off Viktor and further onto the bed, turning onto his back, his skin flushed from Viktor's bites and words. "Come up here, keep touching me. Please, V." Viktor knows that Jayce never hesitates from begging or has any shame about it.
"I'm open to a less teenage title, but partner can be too formal. Lover?"
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Date: 2022-09-30 08:15 pm (UTC)Viktor sounds increasingly exasperated, then offers a shout of indignation when Jayce turns around and presses them both into the mattress. He's still fully clothed, and his leg brace makes maneuvering difficult, not to mention uncomfortable. Jayce is eager, as always, and Viktor wants to reciprocate, but sometimes they both need to be reminded not to be so hasty. Despite the abrupt positioning, Viktor does his best to return the first kiss and then the second, then thankfully Jayce rolls over next to him, making it clear where this is going to go.
(Which he should have expected, really, given the fact that he was the one who worked Jayce up in the first place.)
"I need a minute," he says, scooting back towards the edge of the bed, hand automatically going to the buckles on his leg. "And, I like partner. It feels more--" Committal, is what he doesn't say. "--mature."
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Date: 2022-09-30 08:46 pm (UTC)He gets to work on the back brace since he is in the easiest position to, kissing all along Viktor's exposed soft neck. Where Viktor was slow and tempting when he did this, Jayce is heated and hungry, but he is worked up. The idea that Viktor thinks he's that attractive is settling on him. That Viktor might desire him in a way he can't resist.
"I think you're beautiful." Viktor is well aware of that, he tells him regularly. "So I like that you're saying I'm handsome as proven by science." Viktor's lust for him is undeniable, he shows him regularly, but as they both know, Jayce likes verbal reminders. He doesn't need more than this though. It'll feed him for a long time.
"But we've always used partner. Am I supposed to say romantic partner every time?"
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Date: 2022-09-30 09:01 pm (UTC)He finishes the buckles around his thigh and then lifts his arms so that Jayce can pull his shirt off, before he hunches back over to work on the rest of it. This, of course, has the added advantage, of providing a large swath of pale skin for Jayce to put his hands all over. Viktor shudders a little at the mouth on the back of his neck,
"I know you do." He says it all the time, and though Viktor knows that Jayce doesn't care how sick he is, he still finds himself wishing he could be less ragged. Be more like he knows he's supposed to be, were he left un-ravaged by the Undercity. He straightens, letting the metal clatter to the floor, using his good leg to nudge his boot off, then his shoes.
"If people can't figure out whether you mean romantic partners, I consider it their problem." But, he gets it. Jayce wants no ambiguity, when it comes to letting others know whether or not they're together. "Shall I call you my significant other, instead?"
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From:We can wrap this one here!
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