[ Jayce looks broad with his clothes on, but shirtless every sculpted muscle is on display and ripples when he moves. He sets the hammer down, already making plans to close everything down soon so Viktor doesn't have to stand in the uncomfortable heat for long. Unless they're about to fight, in which case who knows how long they'll be in the same space. Jayce does expect maybe a fight; Viktor rarely apologizes, so he's genuinely shocked when that's the tone Viktor goes into his mini-speech with.
Unkind. Maybe. They've both made mistakes. Viktor doesn't know to the extent of how far Jayce went, and he will tell him, for certain. This is probably Viktor's only unkind thing in Jayce's mind, because it hurts, because even now he's uncertain his friend really gets it. He shakes his head and crosses the room to get a towel, he's covered in oil and sweat and he always tries to wash off before being around Viktor. ]
That night I sat by your bedside and I tortured myself for hours over what I did wrong. I counted every one of your breaths and I thought about the lengths I would go to for your life. But I also thought about how long you knew. You say urgency, but it wasn't always urgent, was it? You shrugged off my questions about your health as it deteriorated, and I told myself, it's fine, he would tell me if it was serious. He wouldn't lie to me about something that important.
[ Jayce wipes his face off first and puts the towel around his neck, stepping closer to Viktor. He is careful not to get too close, for a variety of reasons, and also doesn't want to tower either. He is so sad, and it all shows. The grief on every line in his face. ]
I love you, V.
[ Firmly said without any regret. Love can mean many things and he doesn't see a problem with claiming all kinds of versions of it. As if his love for Viktor isn't well-known. As if he's ever really tried to hide it in its pure form.]
It broke my heart, the idea that you would leave me without any answers. But yeah I feel like I can't be mad at you because it's me putting the burden of my feelings on your already heavy shoulders, so it's wrong. You shouldn't have to waste your energy on me. But at the same time, I wish you would.
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Date: 2022-04-22 12:35 am (UTC)Unkind. Maybe. They've both made mistakes. Viktor doesn't know to the extent of how far Jayce went, and he will tell him, for certain. This is probably Viktor's only unkind thing in Jayce's mind, because it hurts, because even now he's uncertain his friend really gets it. He shakes his head and crosses the room to get a towel, he's covered in oil and sweat and he always tries to wash off before being around Viktor. ]
That night I sat by your bedside and I tortured myself for hours over what I did wrong. I counted every one of your breaths and I thought about the lengths I would go to for your life. But I also thought about how long you knew. You say urgency, but it wasn't always urgent, was it? You shrugged off my questions about your health as it deteriorated, and I told myself, it's fine, he would tell me if it was serious. He wouldn't lie to me about something that important.
[ Jayce wipes his face off first and puts the towel around his neck, stepping closer to Viktor. He is careful not to get too close, for a variety of reasons, and also doesn't want to tower either. He is so sad, and it all shows. The grief on every line in his face. ]
I love you, V.
[ Firmly said without any regret. Love can mean many things and he doesn't see a problem with claiming all kinds of versions of it. As if his love for Viktor isn't well-known. As if he's ever really tried to hide it in its pure form.]
It broke my heart, the idea that you would leave me without any answers. But yeah I feel like I can't be mad at you because it's me putting the burden of my feelings on your already heavy shoulders, so it's wrong. You shouldn't have to waste your energy on me. But at the same time, I wish you would.